Monday, July 30, 2012

the spirit moving

So, dear readers, here I am after yet another long absence. This one is maybe longest of all. I have been hiding my face out of shame.

But as we all know, that is the least constructive of emotions. Buck up and move on, I say.

Where have I been, you might ask? Or maybe you are not asking, because you have used your powers of deduction to figure out from my last post that I was in the Big Easy for a few days - New Orleans.

I have loved the city of New Orleans. Last time I was there it was spring break of my senior year of college. We did karaoke and drank hand grenades and hung out with dreadlocked musicians from Portland, Ore. We danced to swing and jazz and funk and jam bands in the cobbled streets of the French Quarter, and spent an entire afternoon on the trolley carting to the end of the city and back.

gator sausage.
This trip was a little different. As I [may have] mentioned 2 Wednesdays ago, this trip involved me being an "adult leader" (HA) for seven high school youth from my church.

I know you are laughing at this great joke right about now. Me, an adult leader? Me, actively involved in church?! ME not setting foot on Bourbon Street...

And still having the time of my life?!

This trip was really important, though. You might have noticed (my mom did) that I was starting to spiral into a rut of neurotic angst and perpetual anxiety. I was getting lonely and losing touch with the cornerstones of my life, my identity, my values. Not to the point of no return, not banishing them from my life, but but losing touch with what really matters.

By the way, thank you all again for reminding me of this, reminding me that while these things may have gotten covered up in the dust of routine and responsibility, they are not worthless or broken. Dusting things off is a relatively easy chore, and so rewarding as you can immediately see the difference in your life. So thanks for reaching out your social networks to reassure me. I sincerely hope it was mutual.

But the youth gathering reminded me of how to move in a group - not only in a group of 4 (the girls in my room) or a group of 10 (the Hope Lutheran, DE, contingent), but in a group of almost 34,000. This motion is unbelievable. Slow, at times, and obnoxious to resident drivers when our accordion effect fails to heed traffic signals. We got better by the end of the three days.

This motion, though, is unbelievable. We high-fived at least hundreds of people, and got as many "free hugs" as we could possibly need in one weekend. We smiled and waved at almost everyone, and we shared mardi gras beads in exchange for bottle cap necklaces and fake tattoos and cheese-shaped erasers with a tag reading, "Cheeses for Jesus" and the name of a church in Wisconsin.

And when we all got into the Superdome, well, even I couldn't deny the power of the Spirit. I will admit that the skeptic (or the tolerant) in me still wasn't ready to declare it THE Holy Spirit, as in The One and Only, but I decided it didn't really matter in that moment who or what the Spirit is or what it's called. What's important is that we were all there together, moving together and singing "Hallelujah" together and clapping together and lighting the Dome with our cell phones.


We also got to hear some amazing speakers. A few of my favorites:
"Speak the truth, even if your voice shakes."
A woman who opened her home to young people in a gang-ruled neighborhood
Takeaway: Question the way things have always been done
Finding your people!

And quotes from other talks:
It's not what's on the table that matters, it's who's at that table. - Kevin, New Orleans School of Cooking
 People say, New Orleans is different. And it's because we're not living for the dollar! - also Kevin
In the West, people have watches. In Africa, people have time. - African saying, shared by a girl named Megan whose family does mission work in Tanzania
And some memorable musical moments:
Tony Memmel, the one-armed guitarist
Sweet hip-hop band called Rhemasoul
The Gathering Theme Song: "Make A Difference"
...aaaand everybody's favorite, "Hallelujah"

Oh, and we also saw Switchfoot.*

*This is the part where I scream like a 12-year-old girl who just ran into Joel/Benji Madden. ...Do I date myself?

Every day was packed, and our group was fantastic and reflective and mind-blowing. We learned a lot and thought a lot, about service and sharing and grace (you know, good Lutheran things). I'm sure I will find ways to bring it up for weeks. But I need to get this out. I want to go to bed an hour ago, and I meant to write a letter tonight.

But first I must finish my list of excuses for not writing for two weeks. I guess everyone deserves a vacation, but these reasons are important to me, and they're important to the continuation of this blog.

On the way home, we (of course) ran into some flight issues and so spent literally the ENTIRE day in airports, from 7:30am until 1:30am. And aside from all the logistical issues, almost our entire group got sick. So I spent last week praying I wasn't going to come down with it, while really coming down with it the whole time and being fuzzy in the head and cranky at work. I made a new friend on Tuesday, and saw a fantastic production of A Midsummer Night's Dream on Wednesday, and went to Zumba on Thursday, and finally on Friday, just in time for the Olympics opening ceremony, I got pretty miserable. So I spent Saturday recovering. And suddenly another week has gone by and I'm finally caught up on sleep (as much as I will ever be) and I spend my Monday evening apartment hunting, which was really quite a good time, and I still have 10,000 things I want to do, and write about.

So rest assured, dear readers, that there is always more to come.

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