Q&A

Please believe me when I say that I am at least as concerned as you are by the increasing number of my posts lately that start out: “I’m sorry I haven’t written in 4/5/6/7 days, but…”

Then again, maybe I’m not that concerned.  Keep in mind always Tolstoy and the Writer’s Dilemma: How To Live Life and Also Write About It.  And I can assure you, the reason I haven’t written in 5 days (or responded to a growing stack of letters and emails in much longer than 5 days) is because I have been living pretty fast & furious.

Here is what astounds me about this: 2 or 3 months ago, my life consisted of working two jobs, sleeping through church, working out a few days a week and blogging on the days I didn’t.  Every now and then I would take a weekend off and drive north to visit my people.  Far-flung friends would text, call, email and Facebook me to ask how I so successfully found work; how I meet people; how I deal with homesickness or physical sickness or heartsickness, or with a painful breakup.  And I have by and large felt highly unqualified to answer these questions: I found my job on Craigslist in a flash of luck.  I don’t actually know anyone yet in the state of Delaware.  If you learn the secret to getting over a breakup, or if you find a way to teleport to where my besties are, please let me know.

But suddenly on Sunday I found myself at Buffalo Wild Wings, surrounded by Ravens fans, drinking beer with two people I met at two separate networking events, some people I met through them, and an ex-suitemate from college, talking about Southern accents and speeding tickets and planning a Super Bowl party, of all things.

Life is very, very strange, but very good.

Here are a few reasons why:

Anna Linn, my TMI Pod protege, flew up from Nashville this weekend to hang out in my new life.  We haven't seen each other since May, which was MORE THAN 6 months ago!  Also, she is newly 21.  This combination of factors means only good things, as we all know.

When we first planned this weekend, months ago, I had planned on taking the weekend off from hostessing so I would be able to spend the whole weekend with my guest.  The way things started rolling in 2012, though, I had to quit at the restaurant so that the end of my 2 weeks fell right on this weekend.  I couldn't very well ask for my last 2 days off, so I decided to just man up and apologize profusely for leaving A.L. on her lonesome.

On top of that, Maria was going to have an audition in D.C. this weekend, so I would have to take Grampi to the airport before Saturday morning while our parents took her to Washington.

Around 1am on Saturday morning, though, it started snowing.  Everyone was ready for it; but by morning the entire area was covered in a couple of layers of snow, all sealed in with a fifth of an inch of ice.  Pleasant.

This Major Winter Weather Event dissuaded my mom from driving over the mountains to D.C., which meant she, my dad, and the van were available to drop Grampi off at PHL.  This turned out to be a massive windfall, because when they finally made it to the airport there was a huge fiasco involving Grampi not being registered on any flights until the next morning, among other things.  I don't have a lot of patience for this kind of fiasco, especially at 6:00 on Saturday morning (after not hitting the minimum recommended hours of sleep once in the past week).  Saved by the Hielo*, I guess.

Translator's Note: "Hielo" is the Spanish word for ice.  It's just a little closer to rhyming with "bell," which brings me a little bit closer to some terrible wordplay.


So Grampi is cleared out of our place now, and en route to his new abode in Cumbayá, Ecuador, via my cousin Andrew's wedding (!!) and a few other events in Cali and Florida.

So A.L. and I slept in, and then drove some errands.  The Golf weighs about 4 pounds and therefore didn't want to stick to the road.  To make matters worse, I had forgotten to park at the top of the driveway in anticipation of the impending dump and it took a heavy foot and a careful hand to make it to the road.  Which, not being one of the 7 highways that triangulate my position in this state at any given time, was not plowed or salted.  This made for several days of delightful driving.  (The second, third, fourth, or fifth spring of the year melted the ice trap this morning with a 50-degree January day.  ...what?)

Anyway, around 2 o'clock my manager called and said there had been so few tables in all day that I could stay home that evening.  What a way to go.  Typical, really.

So I spent the afternoon whacking my driveway with an ice pick so my dad and Anna Linn could shovel our ice luge of a driveway so Mutti could cover the whole thing in kitty litter.

We stayed in on Saturday night.

Also, I visited my first-ever IHOP on Friday night.  Obliterating that bucket list, baby.  What up.  Mostly it reminded me of all my weird late-night excursions to Perkins in Northfield and Owatonna, but without the raspberry muffins and Natalie Merchant.

So.  How do you find a job?  Apply.  Search and apply to as many jobs as you can possibly find, and try a few different industries.

Where do you meet people?  Networking events.  Open mics.  Twitter.  Church.  Your favorite coffee shop (or Japanese restaurant).  Bars and gyms tend to be superficial as a general rule -- but we all know how I feel about rules:

So use your own best judgment.  I've got a team working tirelessly on this question day and night (that's getting more and more literal by the day) so I'm sure the list will grow.  Don't lose hope, dear readers.

How do you deal with homesickness, heartsickness, or a really nasty breakup?  Cry.  Watch Forgetting Sarah Marshall for the billion-and-1th time.  Get too drunk at least one or two times and probably send an ill-advised message or two.  Become a compulsive texter/Facebook wall-poster/Tweeter. Blog obsessively until things get better.

Because they will.  In all honesty, I left some things out of that last list, like find someone to hold you accountable.  Even if that person is 1000 miles away (totally hypothetical), somebody loves you and misses you.  It's like a New Year's Resolution -- mine, as a refresher, is to express my appreciation and admiration more often.  So I semi-accidentally stumbled upon someone who will come right out and say, "I think you just complimented me under your breath, but I didn't really hear it...  I think you said I'm sweet?"  And a few people who prod me, explicitly or with a pointed look, to graciously accept a compliment or praise.

I don't have The Answers.  I perhaps have some, but they are far from watertight.  I'm afraid to say I'm getting closer to the real deal, but it feels like a lie to say I'm getting farther from it.  So we'll just leave it at that for now.  I'll enjoy myself and probably come back with an existential dilemma or an ocean of tears in 5 days or so.