I'll be honest: this winter business is getting really old. We just had another dump of snow this morning, after it all melted over the weekend! And of course it was more than forecasted. I don't know if it's cabin fever, vitamin D deficiency, the cold seeping under my skin, my lack of vacations, or a combination of all those things and more... But I am really starting to lose it. The days start to feel like they should be over by 2:30 or 3:00 - and one day last week I actually spent the end of the day in tears, for no real reason except sheer exhaustion with the things I have to do on a day-to-day basis and the harsh realities of the working world.
When I was five or seven years old, I told my Grammy that sometimes there just gets to be too much and I cry. She told me that helped her, and she told me she shared it with my cousin Angela, who also found it helpful.
And I'm glad she told me it was helpful, because otherwise I probably would have forgotten I ever said it, and thank God I didn't, because to this day I need to hear that on a fairly regular basis. The world gets heavy and we can't just go on carrying it stonefaced forever: it does help to cry.
At this time of year I get restless. I also haven't gone anywhere new in awhile (which is unusual for me). No place is entirely where I want to be - more so in February and March than any other time. I've been having these dreams lately about flying to India. I never actually go there, but the dreams always involve me running through an airport, or packing my suitcases (full of books), or boarding a huge international aircraft.
I get restless and irritable, and full of ideas for projects I can't quite muster the energy to actually work on. I itch to move, to sweat, but I only make it to the gym half of the times I think about going. I ache to escape into books and shows and movies, but I can't focus on them hard enough to forget about the world.
But there is promise. The sun is out today. I have lots of ideas, lots to work on, things to look forward to. Spring will come.
...Won't it?
When I was five or seven years old, I told my Grammy that sometimes there just gets to be too much and I cry. She told me that helped her, and she told me she shared it with my cousin Angela, who also found it helpful.
And I'm glad she told me it was helpful, because otherwise I probably would have forgotten I ever said it, and thank God I didn't, because to this day I need to hear that on a fairly regular basis. The world gets heavy and we can't just go on carrying it stonefaced forever: it does help to cry.
At this time of year I get restless. I also haven't gone anywhere new in awhile (which is unusual for me). No place is entirely where I want to be - more so in February and March than any other time. I've been having these dreams lately about flying to India. I never actually go there, but the dreams always involve me running through an airport, or packing my suitcases (full of books), or boarding a huge international aircraft.
I get restless and irritable, and full of ideas for projects I can't quite muster the energy to actually work on. I itch to move, to sweat, but I only make it to the gym half of the times I think about going. I ache to escape into books and shows and movies, but I can't focus on them hard enough to forget about the world.
But there is promise. The sun is out today. I have lots of ideas, lots to work on, things to look forward to. Spring will come.
...Won't it?
posted from Bloggeroid
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