baby steps: the home edition

Since last week, I have officially given up on reaching 50,000 words. But I crossed the 20,000 threshold goal I set for myself, and I'm happy with that.

Today is the end of my short work week, which is good because I don't know if I would make it through the week. There is too much in November. Monday was my birthday and, as J. said to me, I managed to make it my birthday month.

Besides, this week we moved to a new house in a new neighborhood. And I have learned, in the process, that "living together" and "moving together" are two totally different things. But so far, things seem to be going smoothly.

As smoothly as they can, anyway. I have also learned that there never seems to be that much stuff until you try to move it. Then you find out real quick how much stuff you really have.

And a house seems clean until it's empty and you go to clean it. Then you find the dirt and the leftover cat hair and the grime on the walls.

But bit by bit we are chipping away at it. The old house is getting cleaner and emptier, even though the power is out and the days are dark, and it's really hard to clean by the grey evening light of winter. And the new house gets a little more organized every day, even if I have to get up really early to make sure it happens. Sooner or later, it will turn into home.

posted from Bloggeroid

all good things: people who make weeks beautiful

All Good Things is a weekly feature on the blog. It started as a one-hour Sunday night radio show on KSTO St. Olaf radio, featuring feel-good music and 10 highlights from the past week. The show, and its current written form, is brought to you by Clara, Second Set of Baby Steps creator, and my radio co-host Cassie. Sit back and enjoy!

1. Song of the week: Knock Knock by Mac Miller. J&J (the twins) were stunning this song after we dropped off the Uhaul truck today and it got stuck in our heads. It's really catchy and the video is funny and actually kind of beautifully done.

2. Car wash. It was getting really sad how dirty my car was. I've been driving past the Greenhill Car Wash on my way home from work for over a year now, but haven't got up the guts (or the $8) to try it out. Finally yesterday on my way home from work I decided I couldn't put it off any longer... And it was kind of relaxing, actually, sitting inside my car, hands off the wheel, foot off the brake, surrounded by gigantic soapy brushes. And now my car is so clean!

3. Bokwa. My roommate and I tried out this new dance fitness class at the Y on Saturday. It has a series of steps in the shapes of different letters, and a lot of room for personalization. Plus, I couldn't help smiling by the end of class. I will be trying that again.

4. Having friends you can laugh with. This one pretty much speaks for itself. To me, this is a sign of good solid friendships.

5. Humidifier. We started running the humidifier in our room while we sleep and every since I've been breathing much better. Coincidence? I think not!

6. Emails from my grandparents. They live in California and we're not in super close touch... But whenever they email me it's always good, and makes new really happy. This week it was a birthday email which is double good.

7. Eating when you're super hungry and tired. You know the feeling. Yummm. Plus, a few people made food for us this week so we don't have to worry about cooking when all our kitchen supplies are boxed up somewhere.

8. Clean sheets. I probably enjoy this a lot less often than I should, but maybe that makes it all the more satisfying...?

9. J. and I had to go get the flu and Tdap shots this week so we could kiss the baby, and if course it cost almost $100 for each of us to get both shots. J. doesn't have insurance and mine only covers Walgreens in South Dakota and Wisconsin for some reason, so the pharma tech went to great lengths to find us a discount or make my insurance cover some of it. We ended up getting a few dollars off, and especially right now while we're moving every little bit counts. It just meant a lot for a person to make such an effort to help somebody else, even someone he had never seen before and may never see again.


10. Feeling at home. Today my two roommates and I had a bunch of friends over and moved all our stuff (almost) to a new house in a new neighborhood. And already I feel more comfortable and happy here. :)

We had a good crew of helpers today, which made the whole project that much easier and more bearable.

Thanks everyone for making this week beautiful!


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Thanks for joining us this Sunday night! Stick with the Baby Steps on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/TheBabyStepsSaga for updates on new posts and other stuff about new adulthood. Come back next Sunday night for a reminder of 10 good things that haven't happened yet, and on Wednesday night for a more in-depth reflection on post-grad life. Until then, be kind to each other, and find a reason to smile.

posted from Bloggeroid

oversleeping, and baby steps

Mid-November has come and gone. It's cold, and the holiday season is approaching. I've been sick for going on two months now, things are pretty crazy at work, I'm moving this week, and I haven't done any of my Christmas shopping which I vowed to get done before Thanksgiving. I think it's safe to say that's not going to happen.

It's funny, though, that two and a half years after graduating college, this is the summary of my life. I'm feeling more and more settled into this groove, and to be honest I like it. I have a lot more leftover emotional energy than I had at other points in my life, enough to keep in closer touch with old friends, for example. (Snapchat doesn't hurt, though, I'll tell you that.)

This week, though, I'm resisting the early wake-up. I do love starting the day with yoga, or with 1500 words, but my body just is not having it this week. On Sunday night, I checked my alarm for Monday morning and somehow completely failed to register that I didn't have one set. Predictably, then, I overslept, and missed yoga.

Monday night I double-checked my alarm, but come Tuesday I slept through it. Same this morning. And I haven't even been going to bed past ten o'clock!

The great thing about this is: I don't even care! At other points in my life, even other months this year, I would have been thrown off, anxious, certain that the odd start to the day set the tone for the rest of it. This week, I'm like, "I hear you, body. Thanks for laying down the law."

There are certain things not worth worrying about: things outside my control, and things that have already happened.

Except to the extent that they can inform my future actions and responses.

Does the same thing apply to NaNoWriMo? I've pretty much fallen off the horse and my novel is listing in the doldrums. I'm a little more anxious about how far behind I am on my word count, and how many days this week I haven't written, and how many of my writing days only produced a couple hundred words.

But I'm proud of how far I've come, and I have a good base. A better base than I've ever had for a novel. And I've learned a ton about how to approach the project, and prepare for it, nexth time I tackle WriMo. Yes, there will be a next time!

Baby steps, friends. I'm living it.



I want to hear from you. What are the baby steps you find yourself taking, readers? What are you struggling with? What are your victories? What do you want to know more about? What do you want to read about?

posted from Bloggeroid

all good things: so much love in this room

All Good Things is a weekly feature on the blog. It started as a one-hour Sunday night radio show on KSTO St. Olaf radio, featuring feel-good music and 10 highlights from the past week. The show, and its current written form, is brought to you by Clara, Second Set of Baby Steps creator, and my radio co-host Cassie. Sit back and enjoy!

1. Song of the week: Let's Go Crazy by Prince. Prince featured heavily in this weekend's adventures, and this song seems particularly fitting. The best video I found was actually Janelle Monae's convincing cover, which is great because her song Tightrope was a close second this weekend thanks to my favorite movie: Friends With Benefits.

2. What Would I Say? Suddenly on Wednesday this was my Facebook news feed and it was wonderful. Normally I don't like Facebook apps but this one is worth it. SO worth it.

3. Twelve Years a Slave. I saw it yesterday afternoon and was really impressed at how well they adapted the movie from the book. Super powerful

4. Getting to the washer and dryer in my apartment in the morning on Sunday before anyone else. I always feel super triumphant!

5. I went to a going away party for my friend Megan this weekend. She's going to China for a year! I love going away parties because I get to see so many friends at once.

6. BJ's. A lot of people may not have heard of this, but it's pretty much the same thing as CostCo and it's awesome. I hosted a birthday shindig this weekend, which literally lasted all weekend, and we were able to feed a lot of people food and beer so cheaply. Plus, we are now well-stocked on frozen pizzas and corndogs and beer.

7. Networking. I know you are confused by this, since I recently wrote a post about what I dislike about networking, but I went to an event on Wednesday morning that was so energizing. I met a lot of smart, interesting, successful people and spent the rest of the workweek feeling super inspired.

8. Getting things done. Thanks in part to that inspiration, the second half of this week was so productive both on a personal and professional level. At work I checked so many things off my list, and I also forced myself to get around to things at home that I've been putting off for eons. It's a weight off my shoulders.

9. You know you are a nerd when you and a bunch of your friends sit down and start drinking beer and it devolves into doing imitations of NPR personalities, and it seems like the funniest game you have ever come up with. Seriously though, it was hilarious and it's all I wanted to do all night.

10. Being in a room with a lot of people I love. Like I said, this weekend I hosted people at my house, and this is one thing that never fails to make me happy: having great people around me and hearing constant laughter and good conversation.


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Thanks for joining us this Sunday night! Stick with the Baby Steps on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/TheBabyStepsSaga for updates on new posts and other stuff about new adulthood. Come back next Sunday night for a reminder of 10 good things that haven't happened yet, and on Wednesday night for a more in-depth reflection on post-grad life. Until then, be kind to each other, and find a reason to smile.

posted from Bloggeroid

november again

November is National Novel Writing Month. I am probably almost 10,000 words behind where I "should" be at this point in the month (out of 50,000) but I'm pretty proud of how much I've done to date. Especially given the fact that I am writing on a bluetooth keyboard and an S3 screen, and the sheer volume of other activities that take up my time. I am not a career writer. This is my crutch and also my salvation.

I am writing a story that's been brewing for over two years now. I failed miserably to get any good writing done the past two Novembers... As in, on day one I gave up. So it is good to see these characters come to life, and good to see some substance forming.

But it is also another checkbox on my daily to-do list, another hour to squeeze out of the already overbooked days, another obligation to feel guilty about.

I got an email from the friend who introduced me to NaNoWriMo back in high school, and he said to give myself a break. "Write 30 words a day if they're good, and 30 words the next day and the next, and count it as an accomplishment," he wrote. And if my guilt outweighed my satisfaction with what I've written, I would cut back. But so far, the 1700-words-a-day goal is just the fire I need to keep it up.

November is also Delaware's Grief Awareness Month. Back in college, when I took Mike Leming's Death, Dying and Bereavement Sociology course, I briefly considered grief therapy as a career. Call me crazy, but I'm nerding out hard on grief awareness this month! I am fascinated by common human experiences: being born and loving and eating and sleeping and being grown up and getting old and dying and grieving. And I think on some level I am convinced that if we as people could focus on those things, we would see eye to eye a lot more often.

But grief, I think, deserves a spotlight of its own. Grief is so important and is also one of those taboo topics. It is seen as weakness, sometimes, and is perpetually misunderstood. And if not properly recognized, grief can be a deep dark hole that just gets deeper and darker and more and more isolating and can sometimes turn into depression.

So Grief Awareness Month is an important thing.

November is also my birthday month. I have always treasured it fiercely for that reason, and because November, not unlike grief, is perpetually misunderstood and underappreciated. It may be sometimes gloomy but it is full of potential and kinetic energy, with Daylight Savings and often the first snow and sometimes the first Sunday of Advent.

I do not think that I am a waste of a Thanksgiving baby. I feel strongly that the mixed blessing of being born around the holidays, and particularly a holiday named for gratefulness, has instilled in me a heightened sense of appreciation for the gifts I do have, and a desire to share them.

...Most of them. Except whiskey, apparently. And sweet fried plantains.

November is also complicated, as the month that starts to weigh heavy on my mood. I don't like cold and dark. I am starting to lose momentum more quickly, and find it harder to pick it up again. I am making a concerted effort to seek out things that energize me: stepping up my game at work, 1700 words a day, creating a living space that makes me happy, reading good books and learning new things and meeting new people and nerding out.

What do you think about November, readers? What makes it important and what does it signify to you? Maybe I'll write about that someday.

posted from Bloggeroid

all good things: i wanna dance with somebody who loves me

All Good Things is a weekly feature on the blog. It started as a one-hour Sunday night radio show on KSTO St. Olaf radio, featuring feel-good music and 10 highlights from the past week. The show, and its current written form, is brought to you by Clara, Second Set of Baby Steps creator, and my radio co-host Cassie. Sit back and enjoy!

1. Song of the week: I Wanna Dance With Somebody by Whitney Houston. Last night we went to a Korean karaoke place in Alexandria, and had an all-out a cappella jam session to this song in the way there to ramp ourselves up for karaoke. Unfortunately, we had pretty well lost our voices by the time we got there. Plus the video is awesome.

2. Cleaning the closet! Luke and I cleaned our closet today and gave tons of stuff to Goodwill. Not only is it great to have less material things that I don't use, it's great to know someone else will now get to use them!

3. Mom/Daughter dates. My mom came over to have dinner with me, and we hung out for a few hours just talking. A good gab sesh with my mom is really nice sometimes!

4. I picked up Luke from the airport this week and was reminded of the movie Love Actually. People are so genuinely happy to see their loved ones again, and I was no exception :)

5. Woodwick candles are my favorite new household item. I got one for my wedding and am in love with the awesome sound they make!

6. Amy Grant Christmas music!! I never do anything Christmas-y until December. BUT, I always start listening to AG Christmas albums after the first snowfall. Lucky for me that happened this week. Yes!!

7. Conversation starters. I took my Bluetooth keyboard to the Y on Thursday to crank out a few hundred words before class, and two separate people asked me about it. Apparently my typing issues are not unique, and provide plenty of fodder for conversation.

8. Quiddler. My parents had houseguests this week, friends and former coworkers from Woodstock. After our customary rounds of Bananagrams, they brought out a new game we hadn't played before, called Quiddler, which involves spelling but a little less focus. We all enjoyed doing something new, and it was a great new thing to do too!

9. Wilmington Beer Week. Beer week is great, because all these great craft breweries get featured at all these great local restaurants, with featured menus, and I happen to love food, beer, and local restaurants. The only problem with beer week is it's not cheap. So we chose one for the week and went with it. On Wednesday J. and I went to Dead Presidents and got their featured five course meal with 4-ounce beer pairings from Goose Island. De-li-cious.

10. Tea parties. This weekend was Mary's bridal shower in Alexandria, so I drove down on Saturday and picked up Lisa in Baltimore on my way. I always forget how great it is being around people you've been friends with for a long time, even though I know I miss it constantly. The shower was great, with elegant tea cups and saucers from Salvation Army and a great spread of cookies and tarts, put together by Ellen. And then the tea party evolved into dinner, with lots of good people and lots of wine, and a makeshift version of Loaded Questions, and karaoke in a private room at a Korean bar, which is actually not that different from our normal lives together, which involves a lot of constant singing. One of the great things about Oles. And in general, SO good to be with good friends.



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Thanks for joining us this Sunday night! Stick with the Baby Steps on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/TheBabyStepsSaga for updates on new posts and other stuff about new adulthood. Come back next Sunday night for a reminder of 10 good things that haven't happened yet, and on Wednesday night for a more in-depth reflection on post-grad life. Until then, be kind to each other, and find a reason to smile.

posted from Bloggeroid

all good things: crazy life, crazy love

All Good Things is a weekly feature on the blog. It started as a one-hour Sunday night radio show on KSTO St. Olaf radio, featuring feel-good music and 10 highlights from the past week. The show, and its current written form, is brought to you by Clara, Second Set of Baby Steps creator, and my radio co-host Cassie. Sit back and enjoy!

1. Song of the week: Crazy Love by Paul Simon. I woke up with this song stuck in my head almost every day this week. It's catchy and makes me feel like I can stand up to all challenges, while staying positive.

2. NaNoWriMo. November is National Novel Writing Month and I am determined to finish it this year... Despite "trying" to do it for years and years now, starting as far back as high school. I'm already farther along than I have ever been. I haven't written yet today but as of yesterday I have a solid head start. And it's still fun!

3. Kitties! My parents spent Friday night and Saturday at the beach, so I went over Saturday to feed and cuddle the kitties. I looooove them.

5. Homemade bread. Apparently J. is famous for his bread, but after almost two years I still hadn't tasted it. This week, though, I came home to a hot loaf of crusty garlic herb bread and it's all I wanted to eat all week. Plus it made the house smell toasty and yeasty and herby.

6. Yesterday was my good friend's birthday, which meant we got to eat pizza and cake and go bowling with her and her husband and family. We bought two hours of bowling for six people, which turned out to be too long to bowl; so after two games we still had almost a half hour left and decided to just do silly throws out of turn to try and "play" as much of a game as possible. Then she and her husband and J. and I just sat around 'til ALL hours of the night talking and playing card games. It's good to have good friends, and to celebrate them.

...And speaking of celebrating good friends, Cassie has rejoined the list after taking some time off to get married! So I'm pumped about that.

7. My friend Emily moved in to an apartment building only 5 minutes from me! I'm really happy we'll get to see each other more often.

8. Making dinner with friends. I love chatting while chopping and eating!

9. Bringing back an old school one: Grandmas!! My Grammy (as I call her :) ) came over yesterday to spend some time with us and brought a homemade apple pie. I'm spoiled!

10. Squash soup. One of my favorite parts of fall!



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Thanks for joining us this Sunday night! Stick with me on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/TheBabyStepsSaga for updates on new posts and other stuff about new adulthood. Come back next Sunday night for a reminder of 10 good things that haven't happened yet, and on Wednesday night for a more in-depth reflection on post-grad life. Until then, be kind to each other, and find a reason to smile.

posted from Bloggeroid